Understanding Neurodivergence Through Shared Experiences

Chapter 1: Introduction to Neurodivergence

Hello there! I'm Matthew, and I live with bipolar disorder. While I may have additional unverified conditions, I identify as neurodivergent in various ways. From my earliest memories, I've always felt a bit unconventional. Many of my behaviors and ways of speaking can be disconcerting for others, which I’ve come to understand is partly due to my neurodivergent nature. Many individuals with similar traits also identify as neurodivergent, and this realization has brought clarity to my experiences.

I've learned to conceal many of my more unusual behaviors—this concept of "masking" deserves its own discussion. However, one habit I tend to exhibit unconsciously is sharing "same" stories.

Section 1.1: What is a "Same" Story?

So, what exactly is a "same" story? This occurs when someone shares a personal anecdote, and you respond with a similar experience of your own. It's a way to connect by showing you've faced comparable situations as the storyteller.

Reactions to "same" stories can vary significantly based on one's perspective. Neurotypical individuals, or those unfamiliar with neurodivergent interactions, might react with confusion: why is this person diverting attention from the original story? Conversely, neurodivergent individuals and their close relations may feel a sense of camaraderie, perceiving it as an opportunity to bond over shared experiences.

"When someone shares their story, I want to connect, not compete!"

Section 1.2: The Impact of Context

This divergence in perception can lead to misunderstandings. For someone who’s never encountered a "same" story, it might feel like their moment has been overshadowed.

"Why aren’t you listening to me?"

"I’m sharing something significant!"

"You’re making this all about yourself!"

The last remark can be particularly painful, as it often feels like an accusation of selfishness. In reality, many who share "same" stories aim to express understanding and connection, not to overshadow others. This is especially true in discussions surrounding trauma.

Chapter 2: Navigating Trauma and Connection

When discussing traumatic experiences, the original storyteller might seek empathy rather than a comparative narrative. In such cases, jumping in with a similar trauma can come off as insensitive, despite the intention to relate.

Yet, when neurodivergent individuals gather, "same" stories are abundant. Many of us share similar traumas, and in those moments, it becomes easier to connect.

Ultimately, "same" stories serve as a bridge for connection, not a means of drawing attention. When we find someone with a comparable experience, it’s natural to want to share our own narratives to foster empathy and understanding.

My AuDHD Burnout Story: What Was It Like And What Happened? - This video explores the challenges and experiences of living with AuDHD, shedding light on the emotional toll it takes.

An Autistic Mom with 2 Autistic Kids (And Husband with ADHD) - This video provides insight into the dynamics of a neurodivergent family, highlighting both challenges and triumphs.

It's important to approach "same" stories with an open heart. Most individuals are not trying to overshadow anyone; they simply wish to relate and connect. In a world that often lacks empathy, fostering understanding is crucial.

Be kind to one another, and if you found this perspective valuable, feel free to connect with me on Facebook or support my work on KoFi. Thank you!